Marriage vows sounds absolutely wonderful right at the moment when they’re delivered. But it’s heartbreaking seeing how married couples prove false to marriage vows they affirmed on the day of their wedding ceremonies.
“I take this man(woman)…for better or for worse…”
Just if there’s any respect for the words we declared on that day of our wedding, then marriage will have no reason to split.
We must learn how to stay true to those words. We must learn how to avoid marriage unhappiness. It does not matter the age of the marriage, the option proposed here takes care of it all.
Emotional acceptance strengthens marriage vows.
Married couples must learn to accept each other naturally the way they are. Emotional acceptance doesn’t necessarily mean lowering your ideals for the next person.
It has to do with the way you feel about the person, not the way you think about him. It is the affirmation of the person as a person.
Emotional acceptance is a recognition that basically and most fundamentally he’s something that can be accepted by you.
Most times married couples tend to concentrate more on what their partners should have done, that wasn’t done at the time when it should’ve been done. It’s better to give more attention to the stuff they’re made of, rather than breaking marriage vows just anyhow.
The feelings for acceptance is inherent in everyone, most times it subconsciously seeks for satisfaction.
Therefore, it is true to say everyone have feelings to be accepted by people. It is also important to note that no man can ever be accepted by everybody.
Dr. Ruth Barbee says: “it is foolish for anyone to attempt to be accepted by everyone”.
It is therefore most important to work towards being accepted by people who count on us. Situations get worse, and marriage vows gets broken when the parties of the vows are more concern with ” He should have…” Things that needed to be done, that never get attention, instead of accepting the person for whom he is.
A stranger who goes to a new country is likely to suffer for not being accepted by anyone yet.
The most ruthless and tyrannic leader in the world who have been despised by those they lead enjoy acceptance by the little group of persons around them.
When members of the small group of persons who listens to a dictator as a proof of acceptance, reacts otherwise by questioning his action, the cabinet tends to fail.
For instance, Hitler surrounded himself with a small group of admirers and took them with him everywhere he goes.
Genuinely accepting people for who they are creates bond in relationships.
There is no better way to eliminate rafts in marriages if not genuinely accepting one another for the persons they are.
No one has ever opted for a separation because their partners were particular kind of persons and still remains same way after all.
It is always a pile-up of things they failed to do and new things they started doing.
Emotional acceptance kills every effort that may persuade a person to look only toward the direction of fault finding.
You must avoid being a fault accountant.
Pay rapt attention to the person your partner is.
Keep no record of his shortcomings.
We must understand that both married couples share from the perils of keeping account of the shortcomings of each other, that is when the marriage vows are broken.
Former Super Eagles technical coach, Musa whose marriage vows of more than 10 years was dissolved in a customary court on account of frivolities. Partly, the charge against the wife was that she doesn’t cook very well.
When I heard of the case, I wondered if Mr. Technical coach just realised now that his wife is such a bad cook after 10 years.
Funny enough, the customary court endorsed the dissolution of more than 10 years marriage, notwithstanding the marriage vows . Even when the woman pleaded not guilty to the allegations.
Many similar cases goes on and on in different parts of the world.
Lynda said: “Only if people would always remember their marriage vows whenever they get angry with their partners…then no misunderstanding in marriage would last more than 15 minutes”.
To keep marriage vows to mind, your partner must enjoy your acceptance freely.
Always make sure that you pattern your heart to accept the natural person he is, only then will your marriage vows be kept.
This is in line with tested and proven fact of human relations theories.