Shout at your girlfriend and face on-bed politics at night. Not knowing exactly what should be allowed in relationships contribute largely to the high rate of failed relationships around the globe.
I quite appreciate Susan’s rich contributions and effort towards writing Fleshy articles that have helped pull forward countless malnourished relationships so that they become healthy enough to testify.
Meanwhile, when she asserted that ladies who quit or hold on strongly to argument with their men over claims that their men shout or use loud voice to correct them when they make mistakes are right, I thought of fixing in some point to help a wider consideration of the subject.
The argument is that guys should not ever shout at Ladies they’re dating. What I’d stated severally is that ladies striving to moderate what tone the guys they date use to talk to them when they’re angry would rather increase the anger in the guy, so, for me, there’s absolutely no use fighting the voice…knowing that temperament in people differs.
Yes, I had to make my point very clear. My opinion is that guys should not “shout” at the ladies they are dating and the point of my argument is this: In as much as I am not completely ruling out causes for provocation coming from the side of the lady, the tone of voice used to present or table the issue is what matters.
First, women are composed differently: It might take so much effort to get some set of women to learn or implement a certain trait a man desires in a relationship, while some other set of women need no struggles interpreting the meaning behind every single look on their men’s face.
However, a man does not need to shout or scream at his woman just to get her do something at his pace. Rather, I think the right thing to do is to amicably present his issues to her and be patient enough to see her adjust to doing what he wants.
Secondly, dating relationship is a mutual thing, and therefore should be handled mutually.
For me, a “shout” at a woman coming from her date counters the idea of mutuality.
By virtue of he being her date, he automatically becomes the closest person to her heart. Shouting at her at every slightest provocation will be annoying rather than corrective.
At this point, she expects to be treated differently, and not as everyone else. The presence of his preference of her (as the only woman in his heart) is what she is searching for in the tone of his voice whenever he is addressing her even in odd situations.
I would rather point that mutuality does not work in favour of the ladies alone. It gives both the woman and the man equal right of operations within the relationship circle.
Furthermore, when we work so hard to acknowledge how ladies are composed intrinsically, we also should try to give a sec. to the fact that a temperamental guy who reacted with a loud voice towards his woman’s misconduct hasn’t acted artificially, he is still within the sphere of nature.
Dwelling more on the composition of ladies without an open consideration on the part of men, which will remind us that men are also vulnerable in some aspect of life, will leave me with no option than to tag the effort an invariable blackmail.
The man who shouted after a number of correction or two may also be acting on impulse which he has little or no control over.
The position of the heart should be flexible enough to accommodate both parties short falls, which would by extension help a smooth flow of the relationship.
The facts presented above are quite understandable, especially the statement: “May we also give a sec to the fact that a temperamental guy who reacted with a loud voice towards his woman’s misconduct hasn’t acted artificially, he’s still within the sphere of nature” very true and that is why we are having this discussion.
I would further stress my point by saying; in as much as men too are composed differently and by virtue of that, can loose grip of their temperament at the face of provocation, they shouldn’t make it a norm to scream at their women anytime, anywhere. The effect on her is not a favourable one. It makes her feel less important or valueless, especially when it is done publicly. The feeling of inferiority might set in since her flaws has been brought to bare publicly. She might also feel less loved, and withdrawn.
Temperament or no temperament, shouting at your lady is not just nice. When the man keeps loosing his temperament and keeps shouting at his lady, if it creeps into his blood stream and becomes part of him, he is going to end up embarrassing her other than correcting her which is his actual aim.
The risk is: If a man sees it as nothing shouting at his woman, he will also see it as nothing doing it anywhere, and when that is the case, he will reduce her to nothing before others who have only witnessed his shouting scenes at her but knows nothing about her values.
Why not he replace “shouting at her” as a corrective measure with a more loving measures?
When this is done, he will just earn himself some good measure of respect instead of begging her to respect him.